Messages from the other side?

Messages from the other side?

When someone who has died appears to you in a dream, are they communicating with you from spirit, or are these dreams symbolic? Dreaming of a loved one after death can be the most precious, comforting, uplifting experience, especially when the dream is full of love, embraces, and tender messages, and when the person looks healthy, full of life, and perhaps even presents at a different age – younger for someone who died in old age, adult for a child who died young.

Many a bereaved dreamer cherishes such exquisite moments in a dream, and although they wake up to a world empty of their loved one, they draw on strengths from the night-time encounter and a feeling of receiving support from spirit to get through the early days.

People often feel devastated and abandoned when they discover their loved one is appearing in other people’s dreams, but not in their own.

People often feel devastated and abandoned when they discover their loved one is appearing in other people’s dreams, but not in their own.

Many more wish they could have just one such dream, and often feel devastated and abandoned when they discover their loved one is appearing in other people’s dreams, but not in their own.

On the other hand, many bereaved people have experienced distressing dreams where the deceased person, who was loving and kind in life, is completely different in dreams – angry, blaming, hurtful, controlling, or condemning. In other cases, people who were difficult in life continue to be difficult in dreams, often leaving the dreamer feeling the deceased person is controlling him and restraining him from moving on with life.

There are instances where accurate information has been communicated by the deceased in dreams, information, for example, about the circumstances of death that have been later verified, however these are extremely rare. Contact through dreams in the early days following death may sometimes be the case, but as time passes, you can be increasingly certain that these dreams are symbolic. If a loving person acts negatively in a dream, you can be certain your dream is symbolic.

When anger, abandonment and blame come up in your dreams, these are your own emotions being processed.

When anger, abandonment and blame come up in your dreams, these are your own emotions being processed.

Dreams of the deceased usually deal with grief and healing. For example, it is normal, during grieving, to feel angry with the person for dying and abandoning you, even though this is irrational. When anger, abandonment and blame come up in your dreams, these are your own emotions being processed. When forgiveness and letting go come up in these dreams, these reflect your own readiness to heal and move on, your own resting in peace.

Look at the person appearing in your dream as symbolising your loss, or your feelings about death, or your feelings about that person and the role they played in your life, and then see the rest of the dream as exploring and resolving these issues within yourself.

[Extract from 101 Dream Interpretation Tips, Jane Teresa Anderson]

Further reading: Dreams of death and the departed

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30 Responses to Messages from the other side?

  1. Josh Magee says:

    Thankyou so much for this. I had extreme after death communication from my mother last year when she died. I have vivid a lucid dreams every night and it affects my daily living. The people in my dreams pull me further away in my sleep and sometimes its so hard to wake up. Mum doesn’t visit me that much anymore. I think I am having out of body experiences.

  2. Helen Thomas says:

    Great post Jane Teresa! I find that a dream visitation from a loved one who has passed away usually ‘feels’ different, you aren’t likely to forget it anytime soon. My aunt visited me in a dream 10 years ago and I haven’t forgotten any part of that dream – and it set me out on a brand new path in life too, as a psychic and medium! Now, she often pops up in dreams, but this is more symbolic, and these dreams I tend to forget a day or two later.
    Interestingly, her dream visitation involved leading me through her life sequences, where she introduced me to people from her life I was never aware of. My mum was able to verify many of these people and incidents upon waking. It was a wonderful way of not only connecting with my aunt, but better understanding her life through her death.
    It’s very special to get that kind of visitation!

    • Jane Teresa Anderson says:

      Hi Helen,

      Thank you for contributing your experience and the way your Mum was able to verify the information your aunt gave you in the dream. It’s so good that you are able to distinguish a visitation from a symbolic dream, as that’s where things can get very tangly and confusing otherwise. The distinguishing features seem to be different for different people. What a treasure your aunt gave you!

      Jane Teresa

  3. Dana says:

    Hi! My mother passed away nearly 25 years ago. Last night I dreamed we were standing in line for something.. it was not raining..but we all had umbrellas. My mom said to me, “Open your umbrella” and I did.. I started raising up and flying around with this umbrella (yes, like Mary Popins!)..it was amazing! I saw so many things and even a dog I loved that recently passed away! He smelled so clean and looked so healthy! My mom said to me.. you see I told you if you believe in yourself you can do anything! I woke up feeling so ALIVE and happy! She has not visited in quite some time.I have seen her but we have not had a conversation. Last night she spoke and it was as if she were sitting right here with me! ;) I had to share!

    Dana

    • Jane Teresa Anderson says:

      Hi Dana,

      How beautiful, and thank you for sharing this with us all. So now, whenever you need to get in touch with that feeling of being able to do anything you can visualise doing your Mary Poppins thing, summoning up all those positive, encouraging, soaring, flying emotions and feelings. Connecting with that dream memory and feeling it throughout your body will connect you with believing in yourself and everything that flows from that belief. Fly high!

      Jane Teresa

  4. Jeanne Fox says:

    My Nephew Patrick passed suddenly on 9-16-2001…The day after his Funeral my daughers friend not knowing of the circumstances told her she has a message to deliver (She is psyic) She asked to come to the house..and delivered messages that were ACCURATE and contained details that no one but me his Aunt and his Mother knew…Also a message from his Grandma (My Mother) who passed years before for me personally…whom I was told was comming to get him..He said she was in Heaven..Surrounded by light and Vibrant !!

  5. Jeanne Fox says:

    I made a mistake..Patrick passed 0n 9-16-2012

  6. Alice T. says:

    My mother in law just passed away on Oct. 15,2012. I have not seen her in my dreams, but I feel her presence around me and her son.I visualize her going past the tunnel towards the light of heaven, running towards her husband who passed away 6 years ago. Hugging each other and saying I finally came home.I also had that experience when my mom passed away and my dad was waiting for her at the golden gates.Their encounter was pure bliss. I can still see the expression of sweetness and peace on my mama’s face and on my mother-in-laws’ face that they are in heaven with the Wonderful God who made them who they were. Love, peace and hope to everyone who lost a loved one. They will always live in your hearts with the love that they have for you. Alice T.

  7. daniel geer says:

    My wife died unexpectedly about 3 and a half weeks ago and it completely distroyed me.I have been looking everywhere for a ring I had bought for her that was vary special couldn’t find it any where.lastnight I’m my dream she showed me exactly where it was, I woke up around 3 am and I went right where it said.it was now that’s crazy.The other dream I have had is I’m sitting with her over a beautifuo lake we have our feet in the water and she tells me over and over again I’m here and when u pass in 4 years 5 days we will be together again that’s what scared me.

    • Jane Teresa Anderson says:

      Hi Daniel, So sad to hear about your loss. These are such early days and weeks for you as you encounter all the devastating emotions that go with grieving. Your dream about the ring must have been so comforting for you. Sometimes, in the early days, you can receive information in dreams from someone close who has passed. You may also have known the location yourself but forgotten, or been able to tune in to the kind of place where your wife might have put her ring. You’ll never know, but it’s good that you have the ring, that symbol of your relationship, in your hands. While that dream was comforting, I can see that the second dream was scary for you. On the one hand there’s the element of comfort – sitting with your wife over the beautiful lake – but on the other hand there’s those numbers. Rest assured, Daniel, that numbers in dreams are symbolic. Your dream is very unlikely to be a prediction of your death. My feeling for your dream is that – since you mention 3 (3 weeks, 3 am), the 4 and 5 are symbolically a progression: 3,4,5. My feeling for your dream is that as time goes by – 3, 4, 5 months, years – you will move through intense grieving to a feeling of being ‘together’ within yourself. While you’ll always feel the loss of your wife, and always be able to touch that pain, time does heal in the sense that you find a way forward in life and rediscover your vitality, hope, and excitement about life – you get your life ‘together’ again.
      You might like to read this article about dreams of the death, dying and the departed: http://www.dream.net.au/library/death_dreams.cfm

      Jane Teresa

  8. Shijitha S says:

    Hi,

    I met my boyfriend on 20th May 2006. After few days he asked me my birth date which is (24th Feb). 24th Feb 2006 happens to be the day when his Dad died due to cancer. Not only that I was born at 8.30 am and he died on 8.30 am as well. Please tell me if it means anything.

    • Jane Teresa Anderson says:

      Hi Shijitha,

      Ah, the mysteries of life! I cannot tell you whether the dates and times you give are significant, but it’s important to find meaning in our lives, and sometimes only we – ourselves – can know what feels meaningful and what doesn’t. Keep your eyes and ears and heart open to the beauty of life.

      Jane Teresa

  9. Danielle says:

    A while back on November the 19th my grandad passed away.. Days before his funeral it started to snow and of the day of his funeral it got thicker and faster, Christmas was approaching and he loved snow and Christmas.. Could this be a sign?

  10. LeeAnn Burton says:

    My dad died in February of 2009 after a long difficult illness. I am a daddy’s girl and I misshim horribly. My husband died of esophageal cancer July 1, 2010, after a hard debilitating fight. I am still devistated and the ache will not ease up. I have been a detailed dreamer all of my life and over the years feel I have received guideance and warnings that have been very beneficial in my life. I actually look forward to my dreams. Here is the strange part. After my dad’s death I have not had a single dream about him. My mom and brother have dreams and conversations, and experiences but not me. After my husbands death, I dream very rarely about anyone or anything. Out of the few dreams I have had only a few contain my sweetheart. One was exttremely clear, he was caressing my hip just as he use to when he was comforting me. Another one I don’t remember clearly, what I do remember is I did not want to wake up. When I did I was very despondent. Why can’t I dream anymore about the two men who meant the most to me in my whole life. I simply don’t dream 90% of the time and when I do it is chaotic, jumbled, so unclear. I am stuck and missing them so much why can’t we reach each other? I want my dreams back.

    • Jane Teresa Anderson says:

      Hi LeeAnn,

      Sorry to hear of your losses and your pain, and that you are feeling so stuck in waking life. Some of the questions you have asked are answered in this article:
      http://www.dream.net.au/library/death_dreams.cfm
      You are dreaming – everyone dreams – but you are not remembering your dreams. Or you’re not remembering them well: as you say, the ones you recall tend to be chaotic, jumbled, and unclear. There are many reasons why you might not be remembering your dreams so clearly these days. I’d start by getting a dream journal and a pen and putting it by the side of your bed, and telling yourself that you will – of course – remember a dream. Write down anything – even if it is just a word – in the middle of the night. It’s a start that will begin to restore your recall. Here’s some help about how to remember your dreams: http://www.janeteresa.com/how-to-remember-your-dreams/

      Your dreams – when you remember them – may be more about why you feel stuck and give insight into how you can get in touch with the flow of life.

      You ask why you can’t reach each other. How can you reach into the world in ways that honour your dad and husband?

      Hope this helps.

      Jane Teresa

  11. michele says:

    I wanted to comment about my experience. My beloved passed away suddenly and I was completely devastated. The next week a dragonfly was outside my wmdow. The dragon fly stayed until his funeral twas over. The drgonfly was trying to get in the house following me everywhere and even tried to get in the car with me. I had no idea of any connection and of course the shock of him dropping dead left me hyaterical. I had mamy pleasant dreams of him after that. Today, almost eighteen months later, I decided to research the dragonfly and was shocked by what I read. I talked to this dragonfly for days and I feel bad that I told it to leave me alone. I was talking to the dragonfly like it was Doug, now I think of was him. I had never seen or thought about drafonflies before this happened. Our lovely relationship ship came to an unwanted and abrupt end, and I am forever heat broken. I cry for him everyday and only hope we are reunited in eternity.

    • Jane Teresa Anderson says:

      Hi Michele, Thank you for contributing your experience, and my heart goes out to you in your loss. I wonder if you might take that dragonfly symbol and work with it in art, or writing, or video – any medium. You could write a story, a poem, or dialogue (an imaginary conversation with the dragonfly). Immerse yourself in the symbol or energy of the dragonfly until it ‘speaks to you’ and you’ve cried out all your tears and discovered something really beautiful and life-affirming that you can take forward with you.
      Many blessings,
      Jane Teresa

  12. Jane Hand says:

    Hi Jane,

    Thank you for this insightful piece. I suppose I found it when I began looking for similar dream experiences to mine.
    Recently, I had a vivid dream about a family friend (more so of my parents – he worked with my father, and I went to school with his children, but I wouldn’t actually have known him all that well) who died at a relatively young age last year, following a short illness. So, not a close relative, or someone I had a particular emotional connection with, unlike all of the messages posted here so far.
    In my dream, we spoke at length, and I was fully aware that he was dead but commented on how well he looked now – youthful, happy, and full of life. I remember holding his hand at one point, and he said that all was well.
    I woke the next day feeling very puzzled, after having dreamt about this person who hadn”t been on my mind at all, really, up until that point. The dream was not unpleasant, but as the day went on I felt more and more upset.
    Still puzzled by this, and wondering why I would be dreaming about this person, and what it all means.

    • Jane Teresa Anderson says:

      Hi Jane, Thank you for posting your different experience. The key is working out what he represents to you. Think back to when you heard then news of his death (or illness preceding death). Explore your emotional response. Explore the thoughts that you at the time as well. Then explore why you became upset the day after your dream. What was it – exactly -that upset you, given that it wasn’t an unpleasant dream?
      Remember that dreams reflect the prior 24-48 hours (of your conscious and unconscious experiences), so look for a connection between the feeling of upset, your emotions and thoughts about the man’s death, and some aspect of your life experience in the last couple of days.
      If you would like help in exploring this deeply, and my help in dissecting your dream, understanding why you had it, and finding light to take forward, I encourage you to book a consultation with me:
      http://janeteresaanderson.com/consultations/

      Many blessings,
      Jane Teresa

  13. Sarah W. says:

    I’ve had many dreams of my grandmother ever since she passed from cancer back in January of 2013. Some where we (my family) dug up her grave to find out she was alive. Another one was having her funeral the same time as a wedding. The one I still don’t understand is the one where she dismembered herself and put each body part into a pot of boiling water on the stove. Her flesh literally slipped off of her bones, and I essentially watched her die again in that dream. In that same dream she touched my right shoulder with a fleshless hand from behind, causing me to immediately wake up startled and crying afterwards. The most recent dream I had with her in it was quite pleasant, but we (the family) still dug her up from her grave, but she came back to life after 6 months and was living in her house again. I’m still trying to get in contact via dream with my half-brother (who died back in March, but I never knew about it until recently), but it’s been very difficult since I really didn’t know him that well. Any suggestions of what I could do on my own?

    • Jane Teresa Anderson says:

      Hi Sarah, Thank you for posting your dream experiences, and sorry to hear you’re grieving two deaths in such a short time. You’ve asked me for suggestions on what to do to contact your half-brother via dream. While some dreams do leave us feeling that we’ve made contact with those who have passed, the dreams really make more sense when you look at them symbolically. They are the result of the way you are processing (or not processing) your grief, or your feelings about the person, the loss, about death in general, about life after death, and so on. We can also dream of those who have passed in the same way as we dream of other people we have known or know (and who just happen to still be alive): as symbolising our own thoughts, feelings, and beliefs. (http://www.janeteresa.com/what-you-did-in-my-dream-last-night/).

      You may one day dream about your half-brother and the dream may reflect your feelings/issues around not knowing him well, or losing him, or … any number of things.

      Your dreams about your grandmother are processing your grief. Some are about how to ‘keep alive’ memories and a sense of presence. They may also be about changes you are going through, or considering going through. If you’d like me to take a deeper look, you can book a consultation here: http://janeteresaanderson.com/consultations/

      Many blessings,

      Jane Teresa

  14. Rio says:

    I was hoping you could help me with a dream that I had a few days ago. The people in the dream are not dead; it was my husband, me, our daughter and my husband’s ex wife, who in this life is a child abusing tyrant who we dont like at all and who we are taking to court now for abusing their son. But the dream…I was sitting in a back yard, it was large and beautiful and I had in my arms my 2 year old daughter. I could see a white house about 50 meters away, it was large, white with bay windows, white picket fence and shimmering. My husband came to me and handed me a drink that his ex had made (I’ll call her ‘Jane’). I tasted it and it was beautiful..blended berries and other things, but I remember thinking it had no citric juice (orange, lemon etc) but still had a lovely consistency. I was then sitting at a table in a small kitchen looking out over the back yard, my husband was standing at the end of the table to my left and ‘Jane’ was sitting side on in front of me on the other side of the table. She looked beautiful. She was shimmering, kind of like a pearl, and I felt complete warmth for her. I felt like I had known her for 100′s of years, or like a really old friend you have known literally all your life. She was making more juice and my husband and I were telling her how wonderful the juice was. I remember feeling like they had been married but there was no issues between them at all, neither good nor bad. I remember saying to them both that we should send the drink to the chef’s and ask them to make a meal that would compliment it. There was no one else in the room with us…the ‘chefs’ were located somewhere else. They both agreed. I then realised that Pork would go well with it, but that I dont like pork. I said as much to the others. My husband (who was also shimmering) agreed with me that it would go perfectly with Pork. I remember thinking that he knows I dont like pork and questioned to myself why, if he knew that the meal that would come from the chefs would be a pork dish, didnt he say something. I remember thinking I should have asked for a chicken dish, because I knew it wouldnt go with fish. I woke up feeling love toward Jane, and a feeling that I had known my husband far longer than I had known Jane. I also knew that there was no anger from my husband toward Jane in the dream either, and that we were all ‘friends’ or at least together to help Jane in some way. I have not been able to find a site that could help me understand this dream, so was wondering if anyone here was able.

    • Jane Teresa Anderson says:

      Hi Rio,

      What a wonderful dream, reflecting the wisdom and deep sense of love and connectedness that can arise from working through a difficult situation such as this. There’s also the acknowledgement that it’s ok to make our own individual choices (symbolised by chicken, not pork), that we don’t have to like or choose the perspectives of others, but we can gain deep wisdom by understanding them. Dreams reflect the many complex levels of our own being, so working though difficult issues/relationships with others can transform difficult issues/relationships within the self, and your dream is reflecting this. If you’d like to explore this further, you might like to book a consultation.
      Many blessings,
      Jane Teresa

  15. I always dream of my loved deceased husband but forgets the dream when I awake.Why is this so…any what does it mean if you dream that they are angry.

    • Jane Teresa Anderson says:

      Hi Kathy,

      Dreams so often fade when we wake, don’t they? To remember more of your dreams, stay in the sleeping position and focus on one small part of your dream. As you do this, other parts of the dream will often come back to you. The secret is not to jump out of bed too quickly in the morning. Allow yourself time to drift and recall.

      Dreaming that your deceased husband is angry must be very upsetting for you. It’s a common experience. The key thing to remember is that we – the dreamers – create our dreams. Your dream is not about your husband’s anger. It’s about your own anger (anger is a part of grieving), and may also be about how you deal with anger. Every dream is unique, so I would need to look at your dream (including all the details) to give you a considered and accurate answer. If you’d like me to help you in that way, you can book a consultation by email, skype, or phone:
      http://janeteresaanderson.com/consultations/

      I hope this helps.
      Many blessings,

      Jane Teresa

  16. Susan says:

    my cousin had a strange occurance in his home for a few days. on Jan 7th he told his wife that he had a strange feeling, like an inner awareness that someone was going to die & and would be in the family. four days later our cousin was found dead in her bed. On Thursday before she died, he and his wife heard a bell ringing – like a small dinner bell, or like a tinkling sound. first they thought it was an electronic device, but it wasn’t, as they went to where the ringing was coming from, it would ring in another area of the house. What would you think this is and why?

    • Jane Teresa Anderson says:

      Hi Susan, Thank you for sharing your cousin’s experience, and sorry to hear of your other cousin’s death. My work is with dreams and understanding dreams, and while this work includes looking – sometimes – at people’s dreams about death or their dreams about people who have died, your question is not about dreams. It sounds like your cousin picked up on the other cousin’s forthcoming death, doesn’t it? On the other hand, how often do we have strange feelings that don’t turn out to be true? Only your cousin can measure his experience.
      Jane Teresa

  17. Susan says:

    I forgot to click to Notify me via email……….scaldwell@cullerscaldwell.com

    Thanks!

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